You crazy kids and your vaginas

In my day, I remember when vaginas didn’t have teeth and we had to walk 10 miles, barefoot, in the snow, uphill, both ways, just to find one.

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notes: 19

Silhouette Masterpiece Theatre by Wilhelm Staehle

I was walking down fifth avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel? And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.

— Emo Philips

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Miike Snow - Animal

There’s no denying this Scandinavian band is pure catchy pop that will leave you wondering why you’re currently listening to Kylie Minogue. Don’t deny it. I saw it in your Last.fm music stream.

The pounding synthesized melody with a hint of horns make this unmistakably Nordic. Put on your viking helmet and dance.

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GPOYW. I need more coffee edition.
GPOYW. I need more coffee edition.

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notes: 41

I have to take a shit!

Abraham Lincoln, June 1, 1865, just a few seconds before delivering The Gettysburg Address.

“Scorch II”, 30”x40”, acrylic on panel, 2009 by Josh Keyes

At once meticulous and fantastic, poignant and absurd, Keyes’ carefully crafted drawings and paintings depict animals isolated dramatically in fragments of their natural environment.

“Scorch II”, 30”x40”, acrylic on panel, 2009 by Josh Keyes

At once meticulous and fantastic, poignant and absurd, Keyes’ carefully crafted drawings and paintings depict animals isolated dramatically in fragments of their natural environment.

Mr. Bunners the Rabbit Master by Mike Mitchell
Mr. Bunners the Rabbit Master by Mike Mitchell

A Bull in a China Shop by Paula Becker
A Bull in a China Shop by Paula Becker

Cow: OMG, Have you tried the Hardee’s Monster Thickburger? It’s to die for.

[Other Cows Silent]: …

Cow: What? I mean it’s high in cholesterol. That hamburger turned my mom into a heffer. It will literally kill you. Have you even seen the nutritional facts!?

[Other Cows Silent]: …

Cow: Oh, I get it now.

Cow: OMG, Have you tried the Hardee’s Monster Thickburger? It’s to die for.

[Other Cows Silent]:

Cow: What? I mean it’s high in cholesterol. That hamburger turned my mom into a heffer. It will literally kill you. Have you even seen the nutritional facts!?

[Other Cows Silent]:

Cow: Oh, I get it now.

notes: 8